so me being extremly bored off my ass, have done a couple of things i never would have though myself of being able to do.

first things first: i downloaded aim and actually hang out on it now. i know i was shocked by this as well.

second thing: i recently added texting to my cell phone. this should shock an amaze anyone who knows me. seriously i do not know why i added it, i just did.

third thing: i um am trying to date. this one is just kinda, well...i do not know. okay, just felt like it. god...

forth thing: Nyan nyan, nyan nyan, ni hao nyan, gojasu derisasu dekaruchaa~! i find this to be funny and cute as hell.

well anyway back to, well really nothing at all.

later.

i have started playing FFXI online again.
if you want my contact information, just let me know.
later,
scott.

So, I know I have not been around for a long while and have decided to be with teh writing and place an up date...what fun.

I recently moved out of my mother's home( about like oh something like maybe 9 months ago) and decided to live in with a couple of friends. let me be the first to say that was no good. remember kids when sonic says: never move in with your ego-centric and furry friends, its no good. you get up and walk away...do not even yell at them.
I though when i moved out it would be fairly easy and would make my life easier on me, but the thing was...it was not.
why did i move out of my mothers?
the reason was in part to at the time i wanted to have more freedom and remove drama from my life. i grew tired of dealing with my grandmother and the people in the surrounding areas. i thought that livign with two friends would be fun an i would get over my depression that i've had now longer then i normally have battled with it. this was not the case.

anyway, recently I moved back in with my mother, mostly because i just could not take living with my friends.
look, I love my friends and they are like brothers to me, but i can not live with them.
i do not want to ruin my friendships and would rather them be pissed then get over it...instead of constitly feeling bad.

anyway i'm going...
later,
Dwyne

um so i started playing the pokemon games again...

and i am having such a hard time figuring out how to connect the darn game to the inter webs its not funny...

arg!

oh well i guess i will figure that out later.

night, i start work in the morning and then head to the school after words...later.

nervnerd

why doeth mine heart have to beat thine way toward so many?
why must my heart be torn between so many?
why must i be pained to love so many?
why must i love, those who hurt me?
why am i so weak that i can not help those i love?
why does sorrow lament me tonight?
why do i have to feel this pain?
why do i love?
why do i protect those who do not want it?
why can i not make those i love understand?
why, why , why , why ,why , why , why ,why ,why ,why ,why....
oh dery sorrows that plague me tonight, what haveth i done? to make you hate me so? oh painful melachonly that blights me now, what can i do to save those i love? oh tell me now spector of now, how can i make them see this light? that shield mine heart forever now in eternal cloaked darkness.
oh gallant stead of devils luck, give me the boon to grant the heart a chance to listen now. to eternal heart's contest. i wish it now, forever still even though it causes pain. wish it now and forever to let you know this hollowed pain.
to help you move on to the light, i wish it now even if i'm not the one for you. i give you my heart. if only you would simply listen, to what i say dear children, listen carefully and closely. to the words of love i speak, to the deepest part of my soul.
i cry alone so you may hear this painful hurting deep inside, just a little more and you shall feel my deepest tears upon your warm check.
these wings of love and wings of hate that spite doth give me rightly, i tell you now i'll never take flight, from you who i cherish most. if one must be hated so, then turn upon and gaze at thy foe, it shall be me your eternal foe...
i'll take it all, all your hate. if only it means that you shall live a life of gentle repose. a life filled with whole hearted happiness. and laughter and cheer.
give me this and i'll you smiles, smiles i'll give full of mine tender hopes. gentle now this lips of mine, gentle now these words of mine.
oh smile now my happy loves, i'll cheris thee now and love more.
i'll tell you all how i feel one day soon, just give me this time.
this time to bring it home.
this home i'll fill with love and hope. give my wings time to heal, until then i'll keep them all close.
please, just let me hold you close, even if just to my heart. to keep you warm, even if far from sight.

sorry i did not know where i should post this thing...forgive it and pay no thought to it...i just wanted it to be around to remind me of this moment forever and to engrave these thougths into my mind so that i could not ever forget them.